Safe Roads
Your pick: Smooth transition, or confrontation


Remember the day you and your parents had “The Talk?” Your teenage palms moistened as you awaited details that were uncomfortable to hear. Well, now that your parents are older and less safe behind the wheel, it’s time for you to share some inconvenient truths, before there’s a crisis on the road.

Don’t wait for either an accident of a frightening near-miss. That’s a poor time to ask Mom or Dad to surrender the keys. Driving safety for older adults is an emotionally charged topic, because no one likes hearing that they may be a dangerous driver. Most older drivers think of themselves as safe, certainly safer than teen drivers, even though their accident rate per mile driven is about the same.

That’s why the usual first response of older drivers when confronted about their abilities is anger and denial. Over time, anger gives way to sadness as the older adult sees their personal freedom slipping away.

Families should begin a series of conversations with the older driver when there’s something significant to talk about, such as a change of medication, a health problem, or if the older driver has decided on some type of self-regulation such as not driving at night. Initial conversations don’t require a drive/no drive decision.

These opportunities are also the ideal time for the older driver to give family members permission to help them make driving decisions in the future. In a survey conducted by MIT and Hartford Insurance, half of the older adults surveyed said they had followed the suggestion of someone who talked to them about driving. Fifty percent of married drivers preferred to hear about driving concerns from their spouse. Those living alone preferred to have the conversation with their doctor, adult children, or a close friend. All those surveyed strongly preferred not to have a driving discussion with a police officer.

When talking with older drivers about their abilities, share your genuine safety concerns and desire to protect the older driver’s best interests. Begin developing a mobility action plan to keep the older adult on the go in and around the community and connected to the activities that give the person’s life meaning. If the older driver has cooperated in an ongoing assessment of their driving abilities and actively participated in decisions along the way, the transition into giving up the keys will go easier for everyone involved.

Who wouldn’t prefer a smooth transition to an angry confrontation?

AAA Connection

  • AAA Colorado has several resources and brochures in regards to traffic safety. Visit our website for more information.

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